Jagged Little Pill

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“I protect myself by refusing to know myself.” – Floriano Martins

Purpose finding is hard work.

Not like rolling-up-your-sleeves-and-digging-a-ditch hard work (I’ve never actually done that before) it’s more like mental-anguish-which-hopefully-leads-to-awareness-of-what-I-really-want hard work.truthordenial

Over the past week, I’ve read so many resolutions that I’ve concluded they are primarily about the ability to initiate and sustain the mental effort required to meet our personal goals.

But when does a well-intentioned resolution (or goal or change) appear to span the scale of coping mechanisms? I’ve heard countless resolutions from family, friends and associates — some have decided not to make resolutions, but the others were well-meaning in their decisions and I fully believe that they will be met . . . but some (a few), spanned from delusional to denial to downright blatant lies.

Don’t worry I won’t throw stones; I live in a glass house too. And I’m pretty sure that I have quite a few things sitting on both ends of the spectrum.

But I’m fascinated.

And frustrated.

In my professional life, to help clients get to the root of why something has to be created we often ask one question repeatedly: why.

And more times than none, they realize one or two things: either it’s something that they unquestionably should pursue because of the apparent business value or it was being done in response to a perceived threat to their market share and/or bottom-line.

I think the same principle can be applied here.

If there is a goal, ask yourself why that goal is so crucial.

And then ask yourself again.

And again.

And more times than none you’ll realize one or two things: either it’s something that you genuinely want to do (and if this is the case, then figure out a way to sustain the interest to get it done) or it’s something that sounds like the right thing to say.

And that’s okay too.

Purpose finding is hard work.

Not impossible work.

Informed empowerment and fulfillment come with practice. Resolutions are synonymous with hope.

If your intensions are good, and you seek something with your whole heart focusing on the feeling and not the destination, the rest will follow.

Did the resolutions or goals you made for yourself this year come from a place of truth or denial?

16 thoughts on “Jagged Little Pill

  1. Years ago I ran a marathon. It wasn’t the finish line that made the greatest difference (that was just a moment in time) — it was the keeping at it, the going through the ups and downs of training, the pain, the injuries, the setbacks. It was the discipline, the commitment and the things I learned about me and my capacity to set my sights on an objective, and reach it that truly made the difference.

    Why did I do it? Because it taught me more than not doing it could have.

  2. Mine came from a place of truth! CeCe, this is a great article, looking at our motivation behind our actions and how that relates to their sustainability. I also like the emotional hoarding article but couldn’t comment on it with my phone :(. Look forward to reading more! Glad you connected!

  3. Yes…it IS hard work. I’ll be doing it the rest of my natural life 🙂
    I agree, sometimes we make goals that aren’t really ours. In facts, many, many do just that. I think I’ve at least broken that mold…all of my goals are my own, and I can say that because I truly have thought about it…a lot. You always help put things into perspective for me.

    Isn’t it ironic? Don’t you think? (Sorry, the title of this post…it had to be done) 🙂

    • I think we dated ourselves with the title and the reference. I had a great laugh at your last comment. I love what you said, “all of my goals are my own”…you get it exactly. That’s when you know you’re operating in truth because your goals are a natural extension of who you are….not who you pretend to be. Thanks for stopping by, Katie –insightful as always.

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