I was having morning coffee with a friend.
“Where did you think you’d be?” I’m always fascinated when I hear anyone say this because I visit there often; I take stock of where I am in life and wonder if there’s something more I could be doing.
“Not here,” she retorted, staring at the table. “I’ve come a long way, but I know there’s something more for me…there just is.” She thoughtfully traced the rim of her mug with her finger tip.
We sat comfortably in silence for a few minutes.
“Where is here?” I asked leaning forward not actually expecting an answer; I wasn’t sure how she saw her present situation.
“Here is…” her voice trailed. “Here is…I don’t know where here is.” She chuckled quietly.
“So how do know where you want to be if you don’t know where you are?”
Shrugging her shoulders, she relented to the question and chuckled again like I guessed her secret.
“I walked right into that one.”
“Yea, you kinda did.
“Let’s start over,” I raised my hands in a gesture to suggest we take a pause. “Let’s talk about what’s really frustrating you.”
My friend described her desire to move up the corporate ladder in her company but wasn’t sure how to create an opportunity. As she continued to talk, it reminded me of conversations I’ve had with other friends about the same topic. I call it the journey; others might call it the what-am-I-doing-with-my-life talk.
It’s perfectly normal to think about where you are and where you want to be, but not too many of us dwell on what it takes to get there.
Have you ever been passionate about obtaining a dream but to make it a reality requires just one step forward– one seemingly simple act of faith and it’s yours?
But you’re too afraid to move forward.
Or you just don’t know how to get there.
And you know that going back is not an option.
I’m learning that usually there are only a few obstacles that stand in our way: fear, guilt, doubt, and shame. And once we openly and honestly acknowledge those feelings, then and only then are we able to move forward.
You acknowledge its presence; these feelings do not go away.
I’ll let you know if they ever do.
They in turn go along for the ride… but in my experience if I’m driving, I focus on enjoying the journey, and I use those feelings as motivators and not allow them to detract me.
My friend realized that she did want to climb the corporate ladder but not their ladder; it was leaning against the wrong building.
Imagine that, she knew where here was all along.