You’re A Mean One


“Oh the noise, noise, noise, noise, noise. There’s one thing I hate, all the noise, noise, noise, noise!” – The Grinch, The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, 1966

I walked into a popular bookstore this week to peruse the magazines and while I usually hang out in various sections, I instinctually browsed “Women’s Interest.”

I don’t know why, I think I’m conditioned to do so.

I subscribe to the magazines that I really like to read but I often look out for new publications that may pique my curiosity. This day, and not to my surprise, I was annoyed by the bombardment of self-hating messages displayed on the covers. I read a blog post from a fellow blogger earlier this week so I may be a bit hypersensitive to media message – bear with me.

There, in the women’s interest section, by and large, were cover stories that told us how to become the ideal woman and in no short order how we can fix ourselves.

Nip this. Tuck that. Eat this. Lose that. What he really thinks. What you should be thinking.  

Conditioning makes you stop and look. Uncertainty tells you to pick it up. Self-doubt makes you buy it. 

So if I may take a page from the Grinch, this thing called life is not about:

  • who can yell the loudest (most reality TV shows are temper tantrums with commercial breaks);
  • who has the shiniest toys (material wealth, there will be a new version of anything in your pocket or purse next year);
  • who’s the prettiest (nobody really cares who’s the sexist person on the planet – seriously);
  • who’s the skinniest (sure, I think the average mom could drop 40 pounds after giving birth if she had a team of fitness experts behind her too – and I’m pretty sure multi-million dollar endorsement deal helps);
  • the most popular (fleeting fame – 15 minutes expired for many so-called celebs but they’re like the cockroaches of TV, they just won’t die);
  • or the richest (in the words of Paul Mooney, “you’ll never see a Brinks truck behind a funeral procession” – you can’t take it with you).

It’s all noise. It’s all distractions. It’s a scam to sell you crap that you don’t need. To push the latest fads or worse present an ideal of whom we think we’re supposed to be. So the next time you find yourself staring at racks of magazines, before you pick it up ask yourself: is this really going to enhance my life or is this just a bunch of noise?

You are divinely perfect just as you are.

14 thoughts on “You’re A Mean One

  1. Even the Grinch was rehabilitated 😉
    I try soooo hard not to bring those magazines into our house for my daughter’s sake. What’s the point?

  2. So true! I work in a library, so there are magazines all around me, luckily most are more worthy and we tend to stock a limited selection of the shouting variety, but you still get the photoshopped gorgeous people, with perfect lives, perfect children and things to say that will not enrich my life!
    Even good old Oprah, she of the ‘be youself, love yourself’ mantras has herslef photoshoped beyond belief on her ‘O’ covers…

    Arrggh!! Don’t buy them… resist, better still write to Editors of the worst offenders and complain, start a revolution!!

  3. I think the most important thing is to just not pay attention to those types of magazines and TV shows. Most people I know would agree beauty tips are useless and people who scream and do stupid [stuff] on TV are dumb***. Yet they still buy the magazines and watch Jersey Shore. Their argument is “well sometimes it’s funny to read/watch stupid shit celebrities do.” Okay, but there is already enough stupid nonsense in our society, and you’re just feeding into it so they can create more. Many people say “oh, sometimes I just like a little bit of fluff.” That’s quite alright, provided it’s actually “a little fluff.” However, most people don’t realise that their entire lives are filled with stupid fluff. Hence why I run into college graduates who can’t even find Spain on a map but know all the intimate details of the Kardashians. -_-

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