Sow Good Seeds

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I cleaned my closet in honor of spring’s arrival. It’s an annual ritual and every year I go through the same routine:

Too big.
Too small.
Why did I buy this?
What was I thinking?
I should have bought two of these.

And every year I come across several items that mean the world to me: my grandmother’s good book (her Bible); the straw hat she wore while in her garden – she loved that thing; my uncle’s dashikis, and some old family photos. I collected these and a few other mementos after they passed on many years ago. My grandmother died of complications from diabetes and my uncle died a year later (rather young) from pneumonia.

For a while I could still smell my grandmother’s house in her things. Her hat. Her Bible. The quilts. And I’ve listened to my uncle’s Earth, Wind, and Fire CDs, wore his dashikis and read his Black cultural and critical race theory books repeatedly. It gives me pleasure to use the things that I know brought them pleasure. I’m in their company always but especially during spring cleaning. I feel that it reconnects me to two people that have instilled in me a sense of purpose and being.

With spring comes change and renewal and I’ve come to regard it as an opportunity for sowing good seeds. For a while there, I felt exhausted. It was not a good feeling. It was as if I was standing on the beach and the tide came in and pulled me into the sea. What’s weird is that it felt like an out-of-body experience. I could see myself from the shore. Restless.

Needless to say I’m back. I’m focused and am ready for renewal. I thank God for spring. I think I’ll pull my grandmother’s hat out the closet; I’ve got some more sowing to do. What seeds will you sow?

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